My Poor Baby

I've been sharing with you all the crap that's gone on since Brookie's been born. This is just another to add to the list. Sometimes Brooklyn spazzes out when she's eating: latching off and on, grunting, kicking her legs; it's like she's frustrated or something. Two mornings ago it was really bad and she was crying like eating was hurting her. First thing that popped into my mind: thrush. I looked in her mouth and sure enough, white spots on her inner cheeks. By the way, she still has her painful skin rash. Crap and corruption! My sweet older sister hurried over to look at her mouth for me and we decided I should definitely take her to the doctor. I'm starting to feel like I should just sleep there and save myself the trips back and forth. Sure enough, my poor 6 week old has thrush. In her mouth and on her butt. And I have it from nursing. The catch 22 of it all: it came from me being on antibiotics for the mastitis! What the crap! I feel so bad for my poor little baby. All I can do is keep promising her that it's not always like this (even though her whole life has been so far) and hold her as much as I can. I'm so discouraged! In the meantime, the house is falling apart and I'm not able to spend as much time with my two year old as she needs. Thank goodness I have such an amazing older sister and husband. Erin had me over to her house yesterday so I could take a nap with Kate, and Steve took care of Kate after he got off work so I could sleep in this morning. Thank you so much! Now everyone just hold your breath and pray that Brooklyn doesn't get anything else!

Things to Make You Smile...

I just wanted to share with you guys some of the things my girls (mostly Katleyn, seeing as how Brooke is only 6 weeks old) say and do that make my life what it is.

I just realized the other day, when I gave Kate a piece of pizza for lunch, that she calls pepperoni, "pepperina". How cute is that! Yesterday, we were in Wal-mart picking up a prescription. When a 10 year old girl wearing a skirt and heels with her hair up in a bun walked by us, Katelyn pointed and exclaimed, "Look mom! A binnerina!" (ballerina). It made that little girl so happy that Katelyn thought she was a ballerina! Then there's how she says spaghetti and spaghettios. "Skedabedy" and "Skedabedallos". I think something might be lost in translation, but trust me, it's hilarious. Today, Brookie made me so happy. She smiled at me like 5 times! It's been hard because she's been so sick - sleeping all the time, fussing whenever she's not sleeping. Not only was I thrilled to see her beautiful smile, but I can tell she's feeling better too! Thank goodness.

Yesterday was Steve's birthday, and we had his family over for dinner. His family is so much fun and really came through on helping me with the project I did for him. Thank you all so much! Steve said he had a really good birthday. I love you all!

Look, Ma! It's Mastitis!

Saturday started out so well. Steve and I took the girls on an adventure day. We had so much fun! We headed home around 5, and that's when I noticed my back was really hurting, but I chalkedit up to being on my feet and toting around a 2 year old and a stroller. By six o'clock, things had gotten ugly and I started to think I was getting sick. When Katelyn was still brand new, I got a really bad flu. Unbelievable body aches - my skin hurt, chills so bad I could barely hold on to my baby, followed by intense hot flashes. Besides almost dying of pneumonia, that's the sickest I've ever been.

So, when I started with the same symptoms, I was freaking out! Not only was I worried about how in the world I would take care of a newborn and a two yearold if I was that sick again, but the last thing I wanted was my newborn, who was just in the emergency room last week, getting the worst flu ever. Then my mom mentioned that it could be mastitis...please let it be mastitis! Even though it would still suck, I can't give that to anyone else! So we went to the urgent care clinic and sure enough, it's boob infection. Yay! I've never been so happy to feel so crappy! So, even though I've spent the last couple days in agonizing pain and freezing cold with a sore boob, I'm so glad it's not the flu!

Katelyn's ABC's

Katelyn has been doing so well with her new baby sister. She is so sweet to Brooke. She always wants to know right where she is and that she's okay. She's always saying things like "Good morning, sweetheart!" and, "Brooklyn, you're my favorite friend." I couldn't have asked for her to respond better to her sister. But, every once in a while, we get a reminder that she still needs some extra attention. Like this morning. Steve and I were sitting in the front room with Katelyn going over the abc's while she drew on her chalkboard. We were asking her randomly what letters made what sounds. She is really good at it. When we got to the letter B, she correctly answered that it makes the sound "ba". Steve then said "Ya. B as in b-b-b-Brooklyn!". I don't think Kate liked that very much because she replied, "b-b-b-ME!".

Ballerina Girl

Katelyn has a cousin a couple years older than her who we are forunate enough to get all her hand-me-downs from. With this last batch that we got, there was this pink ballerina outfit and some glittery pink shoes. She has worn them every day since we got them! She loves to dance and pretend to be a ballerina. I can't wait for her to start dance this year! She also tried on one of the sweaters we got from her and said, "Dad, this is a wonderful sweater for me to wear!". Thank you so much Jeff and Denise for all the beautiful clothes you give us! We love them so much and everyone always says how cute Katelyn looks. We love you!

Eye Openers and Gratitude

My family has had a crazy week that has made me reflect on a few things. Brooklyn started a few days ago acting very lethargic, congested, sleeping more than usual, and eating less. I took her to the doctor where they tested her for RSV, and it came back negative. That night and the next morning, things got worse. Her breathing patterns were very erratic. When I called Wee Care Saturday morning to tell them what was going on with her, they told me to take her to the ER NOW! Mom and I rushed her to the ER where she had some tests done and they cleared out her airways a couple times...which was extra scary, considering what we went through when she was born. We spent the day in the ER and left with an order to get a nasal suction machine to take home so she could breathe, and a promise of test results in 18 hours for things like H1N1, various forms of influenza, rhino virus, and other scary sounding viruses - none of which I want my 3 week old to have. The machine was delivered to the house shortly after we got back. It pretty much sucks all the snot out of her head...which she had plenty of. Since we got the machine and have been using it whenever she sounds mucousy, she seems to be improving! She's eating better, sleeping better, and actually wakes up once in a while! I can't imagine what we would have done 100 years ago and didn't have this amazing technology and modern medicine to rely on. (The test results came back with a positive result for rhinovirus.)

That being said, I am most thankful for the spiritual side of Brooklyn's recovery. My dad gave her a blessing before she went to the hospital, saying that she would heal and be fine. So even though it was so stressful and sad that my brand new baby was so sick, I knew everything would be okay. Dad had said so, so I knew that Heavenly Father had said so. How awesome is it that we have THAT to rely on?! I'm so grateful for a father who has the ability to do that, and for an ever-growing testimony of the power of the Priesthood and it's blessings.

I'm also learning how amazing reading the scriptures can be. Those of us that have grown up in the church have herd the story of Lehi's vison of the Tree of Life over and over again. For me, it had become just a story. A little while ago, Steve and I decided we need to read the Book of Mormon all the way through. When we got to that same story with the iron rod and the big and spacious building, it suddenly wasn't just a story. Something about it had changed. Actually, I think something about me has changed. I realized: It's not just a story. It's how it is. Life. Now, that is my favorite story from the Book of Mormon. How great it is that not only does Heavenly Father not only have a wonderful goal for us to direct ourselves to, but also a path leading there, and an iron rod to hold tight to to help us get there! It also made me realize how much happier I am now that I'm out of the big building and stepping out of the mist.